Monday, May 12, 2014

I Forgot to Shave My Legs

 Photo: © |

I'm sure as ladies, we have all been there. Letting our leg hair grow a little on the wholly mammoth side. Maybe because its winter.  Maybe its a tactical plan to hold out on sleeping with a guy on the first date.  Or maybe, like in this case, you just kinda forgot.

The Time I Forgot To Shave My Legs

I booked a deluxe mani-pedi as a treat to myself. My feet were in rough shape, and I was in need of some "me" time.  Usually when I have such an appointment, I make sure my legs are freshly shaved. This time however I guess I was too busy to remember.  I don't want to blame motherhood for my lack of time and forgetfulness........actually, yeah I do.  That's exactly why it slipped my mind.  

The morning of my appointment I ran around the house trying to get ready with a toddler hanging onto my face. As I cartwheeled my child at my husband, and ran out the door with a half eaten bagel clenched between my teeth, I knew I was forgetting something. I just knew it.

I arrived at the nail spa, and the technician told me to pick out my color, while she got the pedicure station ready. I did just that, then sauntered on over to the pedicure area, already excited about the amazing leg massage I knew was coming. I sit down, roll up my tights..........


I forgot to shave my fucking legs.

I'm not sure what to do. Do I run? Do I just stay put? Do I come up with an elaborate lie, and reschedule? My legs seriously look like I've been in hibernation for the past six years. This is the weathers fault. It's been a long winter, I'm not use to shaving so often, damit!!

The attendant sits down on her stool, ready to get to work. I let out a sigh, and decide to just let it happen. Maybe she won't notice........who am I fucking kidding, of course she is going to notice.  I can pretty much style a french  braid into my leg if I really wanted to.

She gets to work on my toe nails, and my usual chatty self is staying mute, watching the TV. If I don't speak, it will be less awkward.

She busts out the lotion and goes for my legs.  

Did this bitch just wince? 

In a high pitched, giggly voice I say "I swear I'm not usually this hairy, but you know, motherhood, right?, Ha ha ha ha......."  My laugh trails off into the silent air. I seriously hate the sound of my own voice right now.

She gives me a pathetic giggle back with a half smile/shrug.

Why couldn't I just keep my mouth shut, and not point out the obvious long locks of leg hair. I mean I can actually feel the strands running through her fingers.

The rest of the pedicure ensues in silence. I leave the spa feeling such shame.  The only cure is to stop at Dairy Queen, and drown my sorrows in a hot fudge brownie sundae.

Would you have stayed?  Or re-booked?

Shauna Lynn


  1. Oh Shaunna, you must have been mortified but it really can't be the first time that has happened to them.Even if it was you never let the client se you react. It's really unprofessional of them to react. I have had it happen to some of my clients who have come in for body treatments and it really doesn't bother me. I just want the client to have a relaxing experience an not focus on the hair on their legs. I have a feeling you were more upset about it then the person working on you.

    1. Yeah, I wasn't as upset as I was more like "fuck, I look like a sasquach"!! I felt bad for the girl who had to comb her way threw my hair! lol! Oh well, glad to hear it really isn't that big of a deal!! xo

  2. I would have TOTALLY stayed! I'm a frequent patron of nail salons and while I've been getting my nails did, I've glanced over at the pedicure area where there is a hot mess of overweight, veiny, hairy, crusty, probably disease ridden toes and feet that those ladies have to work on day in and day out. I literally watched a woman get her crusty toes done while talking about her third lypo procedure and eating fried something out of a brown paper bag. A little stubble never hurt nobody.

    1. Oh Shauna, your fucking hilarious!!! I feel better knowing I'm not the only one who would of stayed!!

  3. I would have stayed. Are you kidding me right now? Hell-to-the-no would I have left!

    You mean to tell me that if I were able to get out of the house -- without a child hanging off me like an appendage -- and arrive to the salon successfully...I'm supposed to be perturbed by some leg hair?

    I don't care if my shit was so long it could be French-braided, I'm getting my pedi, thank you very much!

    Great post, Shauna!

    1. You make an excellent point Courtney!! It makes me feel better that I'm not the only one that would of stayed with long locks of leg hair!! lol!!

      Thanks for the comment and stop by!!

  4. Hahahaha.... Brilliant! I have never until this winter gone without shaving.. Then it just kinda happened. With the weather we are having in Chicago right now, I am not sure if I will ever have to shave again!!! I drove in a Fu*king Sn*w storm yesterday!!!!! Yeah that's right May 16th!!!!! Nice job, glad you got the pedi!!!!!

    1. Wow, a snow storm in what the fuck!!! I'm totally blaming it on the weather.....its been a long no shaving winter for me......I'm just getting use to shaving again!! :) Thanks for stopping by!

  5. Totally would've stayed. And now that you bring it up, I cannot imagine my job being to touch strangers' feet. Are you fucking kidding me? Just no. Also, I've never been as hairy as I was this winter. I don't know if it was the kids, the cold, or I've just given up on sexy, but I just let that shit grow!

    1. It's the weather!! I'm still trying to get use to shaving again! Thanks for stopping by!